Chinese Wedding Customs

Summary
Old Tradition
  • A Chinese woman normally will not be able to choose her mate.
  • Wedding decisions are made by the parents, and the bride input is not needed.
  • The match-maker is very important in Chinese culture and was a female-only profession. The match-maker is the middle-woman and takes care of negotiations between two families.
  • If the bride's family agrees to the proposal, then they can demand the type of gifts they want and the groom's side can accept the deal or they can negotiate it.
  • The best number for a wedding is 9.
  • Once both sides of the families agree, they will ask a feng shui master to pick a date and time for the wedding.
  • The parents of the groom will stay at home when the groom picks up the bride. Also, the bride's parents will not follow when the bride is being carried to the in-laws.
  • When the bride is carried from her home to the groom's family, her face will be covered with a red cloth. She will be carried by eight people on a carriage.
  • When the bride walks into the groom's house for the first time, there are a couple of customs or traditions that the Chinese people like to do. First, there is a tradition of placing fire at the door, meant to keep bad luck out the door and bring good luck into the house.
  • The second tradition that people normally observe is using two barrels of water placed on each side of the door. After transferring the water from one place to another, the groom's side gives the bride's relative a sip of water. This symbolizes peace and the bond between the two families.
  • During the time when the bride and groom are busy, their friends will try to hide all the bride's things. This is just a common game to help the newlywed break the ice between each other.
  • The night of the honeymoon, Chinese natives like to buy a pair of old chickens (rooster and a female) and a pair of dry coconuts. This custom is for wishing that the couple can live with each other until their golden days.
  • Before the couple has their first night together, the parents or relatives will put a white cloth on the bed. The family wants to make sure that the bride is still a virgin.
Modern Traditions
  • The wedding is shortened due to a couple of reasons such as people have become busier, and there more and more Chinese people marrying foreigners.
  • Young people have more freedom and fewer arranged marriages
  • The wedding itself has become more westernized. For example, a wedding ceremony in a church has become common and the bride is not forbidden to wear a white wedding gown.
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