Formal Chinese Dining Etiquette (Beginning)

Where to sit?

A banquet will always be in a private room within a restaurant. The simple reason is to maintain privacy. Once you have stepped foot into the banquet, the first rule to follow is seat positioning.

A seat can tell a lot about personal status. The guest of honor will sit with their back facing the wall, the host most of the time will expose their back to the front door, or he/she will be seated on the left of the guest of honor.

There is a legend behind this custom. Long ago, there was a king who invited his enemy to come to his castle to negotiate for peace. When the banquet started, the host king intentionally placed his guest's seat at the front door (with his back exposed to the front door.) As the banquet went on, an assassin slipped into the front door and stabbed the guest king in the back.

From that point on, it did not matter where the hosts sat, but the guest of honor never exposes their back to the door.

As the beginning of the banquet, people will pretend to sit at guest of honor seat. Once the host pushes the guest of honor to sit, everyone else will take a random seat.

Finally, you are able to sit down but on the table there are no spoons and forks. That's right, Chinese people only use chopsticks when they have a meal. Chopsticks have their own set of customs.

Chinese Bowl
How many dishes are there?

When coming into a banquet, do not think there is a three courses meal. Traditionally, the host has must offer more rather than less than the guests can consume. With that being said, you should expect to receive twenty plus courses during the banquet. My record is about thirty dishes, but I ran away after the twenty third dish. So, enjoy (hehe)

The food will be served in a traditional family setting, meaning the food will be set in the middle of the table on a "Lazy Susan," which a plate that spins around. Because you can spin the plate to get the food that you want, please do not pass the dish around. Oh yes, you can reach with your chopsticks to get the food that you want. It is very acceptable.

Other than eating finger food, please do eat with your fingers or lick it. Only children will eat like that.

There is a difference between reaching for the food that you want and digging for it. For example, if there is a piece of a chicken that you want but it is at the bottom of dish, please do not dig that piece of chicken from the bottom of the plate onto your bowl. The rule is to pick something on top or closest to you.

But if you really want that piece of chicken, this is what can you do. Pretend to put some foods (the ones you don't like) on to somebody else's plate. When that is done, the piece of chicken from the bottom is now all by itself. You can pick it up as you like.

This will benefit you in two ways. First, it will show that you care for the people around you and second, you can get what you want. It's a win-win situation (hehe).

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Raphita Tobing